Possibly Helpful Advice

Including what we found in Scientology before it became a cult

Would you like to hear from someone inside the church?

This person and his friends are the reason I began writing this blog. I get an email like his almost every week. I could have been writing it myself just a year ago.

Hi David

I’m writing to you to maybe get some advice.

I can at the moment not disclose who I am as I have many
connections, family and business, that are still in the church.

I am a Scientologist for 30 years, 12 of which I spent in the SO. I
am mid my OT Levels and am a trained auditor. I have been fully part of the
group till my last OT auditing about 4 years ago. Too many
things didn’t feel right to me that I started to have my doubts –
the emphasize on 100% standard tech, while I had the impression,
nobody was really addressing me was probably the biggest outpoint.

When I heard that Mike Rinder had left, I started getting
interested and soon found your blog, as well as Marty’s and
Steve’s. I read almost everything I could find. It was like all the
points got confirmed, with appropriate LRH references, of what I
had perceived over the last years and had accumulated as
“considerations” or “disagreements”. So reading these blogs has
been relieving and it has become a habit to always read them as
first thing in the morning.

Over the last weeks and months I have been talking to many other
Scientologists and was a bit surprised to find out that I am not
alone. There is quite a group of old timers that see what is going
on in the church.

We talk a lot about the subject and discuss about the latest
entries from the blogs.

In between we still ask ourselves if it still could be all made up,
just to be reassured in the next second that this is not possible.

Now we feel the need to do something about the situation. But the
problem is, we really don’t know what. Finding out what is going on
in the church, at top management level, and i.e. the disappearing
of all Int Execs like Heber, Ray Mithof etc. really gives the urge
to do something about it! However, we are all very entangled with
family, friends and business and don’t want to make a stupid move
that is not going to help anybody in the end.

One friend mentioned that she’s going to proclaim her exit from the
church. I don’t think this is a good idea as comm lines will get
cut to her, leaving her with much less power to do something about
the situation inside the group.

We were also discussing how we could make more people in the church
confront the outpoints, but that is also limited for obvious

I personally know the tech works, when it is applied, and that it
basically wouldn’t be such a big deal to apply it if one would be
let to do so. I have no problem with the philosophy and its
founder. I would still like to go further up the Bridge (complete
my OT levels as soon as possible). I would like to see the philosophy
helping people in my environment and see it expanding naturally.
After spending 30 years of my life to this movement, giving nearly
everything for it, I can not just sit back and think it will come
out right in the future. Seeing what the big guys (Marty, Mike,
Steve etc.) are doing, one could get this idea. Anyhow, I feel I
have a responsibility to do something about the current situation.

I hope I didn’t bore you with this and I’m wondering if you have
any advice for me and my friends or what your viewpoint is.

Best wishes,


My response:

There are thousands like us who found the technology and used it to save our own lives and the lives of others.

We rejected all criticism of the church as “entheta” and kept our growing doubts in check until we personally experienced enough out-tech or off-policy actions to shock us out of our self-imposed complacency. We wondered why our leadership like Heber, Debbie Cook, Mike Rinder and others weren’t doing anything to correct the creeping insanity.

After a while our observations, like yours,  convinced us that something was terribly wrong and that our technology and policy were being violated and rewritten right before our eyes.

We finally decided to look for ourselves and many of us started writing up our observations and conclusions in an effort to help others blow through the confusions and betrayal that enveloped them.

I invite you to read every post I have written as they describe my own voyage of discovery and I would like to help you and your friends with your own recovery of self determination.

You will learn that the entire Bridge including the “Ls” and the OT levels is being delivered outside the church by experienced practitioners. I personally am auditing every week and am delivering  Grade Chart Processes right now.

It may amaze you to learn that 80% of all trained auditors are now outside the church. Many are not yet auditing, but I hope to inspire them to resume their auditing activity by bringing them in contact with other auditors and C/Ses who are picking up the pieces of their lives again.

One of the things you can do to help others in your situation is to publish more of your viewpoints in my blog and in other blogs. Your viewpoints are extremely valuable and your writing will help you sort out things that you may not have been able to discuss with others. You will also get valuable feedback from the readers of this blog which may guide you in the evolution you are going through.

Please keep writing. I will be glad to help you in any way I can.

Best regards,

David St Lawrence
Old Auditor

Number of views:144


Snicks  on July 19th, 2010


You and I are in the same position. For what it’s worth, I will give you my 2 cents.

I think we can all agree that what is important is following LRH to the best of our abilities.

I, too, read the blogs and all I can do is decide what is true for me.

What I have done is encouraged other people to write things up and keep doing it, even if it all seems hopeless. It’s not.

I am seeing that what David says on his blogs about delivering the Bridge outside the Church is happening.

I think what is going on is going to be a long, hard battle and I am on the side of LRH, regardless of who is applying it.

I have been told that reading the blogs will inhibit a persons eligibility for their OT levels. I was told this by a very reliable source, whom I trust completely. I just smiled and asked for the reference.

If ever any of us needed to re-read, M9 and clay demo the Code of Honor, now is the time. Follow that and everything will turn out OK, but I doubt it will be today.

Read LRH, study and constantly ask for references. Follow your heart and help others to do the same.

Sinar  on July 19th, 2010


Perhaps there are too many sitting in that similar viewpoint at this time seemingly hung up at doubt. One stable datum in common is LRH.

Not sure on the specific reference, but one thing he was adamant on was to never use a broken line, which the current CoS is, in getting up the grade chart both sides.

Perhaps a review of Personal Integrity and actions to get out of doubt will help- not sure if you’ve read Mary Jo’s & Geir’s doubt formula write up.

Grateful  on July 20th, 2010

One point that I must disagree with is that of many of the independents: the stable datum of following LRH. I consider it irresponsible and dangerous in the extreme to follow anyone without personally evaluating each datum for oneself. It seems to be a common thread that Scientologists, believing that they were doing their duty, have hurt good people because they felt that someone (Hubbard or someone else) knew better than they so they abdicated responsibility and allowed terrible things to happen. It is time we grew up and stopped needing someone standing on our shoulder filtering our decisions. Jump in to life!

yetanotherviewpoint  on July 22nd, 2010

Snicks / Sinar

Thanks for your reply. It’s good to get some stable data in this situation. Code of Honor and LRH.

I will read through some of the articles again on the different blogs.

I just thought it would be good to have some kind of a time track created with all the major incidents… a timeline where one could add articles, LRH references, images, documents etc. from many different viewpoints.

This is basicaly what is happening with the contributions on the different blogs but it would be good to have one major timline.

Snicks  on July 23rd, 2010


Good for you. I completely empathize with what you are confronting.

I live in a small area but there are about 20 of us OT’s and old-timers who have the same concerns and questions as you do.

It does feel good to know you are not alone. It’s a bit of a tight rope, trying to figure out what to do and not do.

I think that as long as you are trying to do the right thing, reading references and following the Code of Honor and The Way to Happiness, you’ll be fine.

OldAuditor  on July 23rd, 2010

As we wake up to the possibility of life outside the church, we go through a series of realizations about the church, the technology we experienced, and the motivations of the Founder and top management people.

Not everyone arrives at the same conclusions in the same time frame. It behooves us to drop the practice of evaluating for others and concentrate on discovering the truth for ourselves.

Intolerance of other viewpoints is the hallmark of the Church of Miscavige. It is part of the Sea Org and Staff Member DNA. We, who are looking to rebuild our lives using ARC and KRC, need to shuck off the Church of Scientology identity we have been wearing and become ourselves again.

I have written more than a hundred articles since I began to wake up and I hesitate to ask others to adopt my viewpoints unless they have examined the facts for themselves. That is why this blog is titled “Possibly Helpful Advice”. Those who need the information can find confirmation here. Those who are not ready can get an idea that more information exists when they are ready to look at it.

It can take years before someone is actually free of the indoctrination they received in the church.

Grateful  on July 29th, 2010


Thank you for your comment. I see that I could have gotten my point across in a much gentler way. I had just watched Hannah Whitmore’s video on Youtube and was overwhelmed with emotion at what had been allowed to occur by good people because they thought someone else knew better. It is still impossible for me to think about this without swelling with grief.

Leave a Comment

Notify me of followup comments via e-mail. You can also subscribe without commenting.

You can add images to your comment by clicking here.

Total number of pages read by visitors: