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Did You See The Incredible News About Phoenix?

The Phoenix Idle Org is at it again.

The stats are so low that they are again to resorting to using their OT Committee to do their advertising for them.

Even though the ribbon was cut on the org back in June 2012, the “official” Idle Org promotional campaign hasn’t yet started because it isn’t funded.  

Apparently a huge oversight in Miscavige’s Ideal Org scheme is that maybe, just maybe, the mere presence of an Idle Org wouldn’t be enough to make enough money to do its own marketing campaign.

It was also negligent to ignore the possibility that there would not be enough gullible Scientologists with money after erecting an Idle Org to buy enough $500 books to fund an Idle Org’s marketing campaign.

I already did an analysis of the inefficacy of Ideal Org “non-existence” campaigns here.

For an Ideal Org “non-existence” campaign to work, thousands of $500 leatherbound Dianetics books have to be sold.

A properly run “non-existence” campaign consists of these promised actions:

• Postcard Mailings
• Print Ads
• Radio Ads
• Billboards
• Bus Ads
• Movie Theatre Ads
• TV Ads & Public Service Announcements
• Personal Contact Invitations & Handouts

To do all the promotional things promised would require thousands and thousands of Dianetics leatherbounds to be sold.

Four months of a single billboard requires that 1000 $500 Dianetics leatherbounds be sold, since all $500 don’t go towards paying for the billboard (Scientology Inc will take its cut before any billboards are erected).

Since $500 leatherbounds won’t possibly be purchased by newcomers, further bloodsucking of Scientology parishioners is necessary.

Necessary. And improbable.

Check out this e-mail that was sent to the Phoenix base.

———————————————————-

—–Original Message—–
From: Ideal Org Phoenix Arizona <[email protected]>
To:
Sent: Tue, Mar 26, 2013 8:59 pm
Subject: Did You See The Incredible News About Phoenix?

 

Click Here to Watch The Special Message

view email in browser | unsubscribe | update your profile | forward to a friend

you signed up for this list

Church of Scientology Phoenix
3875 N 44th Street
Phoenix, Arizona 85018

Add us to your address book

Copyright (C) 2013 Church of Scientology Phoenix All rights reserved.

———————————————————-

Scientology Inc has changed its video promotional approach. Clicking on the link downloads a video to your machine instead of simply playing a streaming video YouTube-style.

That has undoubtedly been done to minimize the mass mockery of Scientology videos, like was done with the Dee-Dee video from the Phoenix Org’s pre-Grand-Opening period.

And the new video is a Miscavige-approved (and therefore unsurveyed) video flash-a-ganza put together by Gold.

This video borrows heavily from the Super Bowl What is Scientology? video.

One of the video’s scrolling pieces of offensiveness says that “All are welcome”. Ha!

Don’t believe it. If you’ve been declared, or you work for a newspaper or other media, if you or your friends or family have ever been in a high-security agency or section of the military, if you’ve ever taken psychiatric drugs or been the subject of psychiatric treatment, or you’ve ever sold drugs or committed other felonies, you’re not welcome.

If you don’t want to download and play a church video on your machine, thereby allowing for the possibility of the church gathering your IP address or putting a virus on your machine, try our YouTube version.

And don’t forget the real definition of incredible:

incredible, adj.
1. so extraordinary as to seem impossible: incredible speed.
2. not credible; hard to believe; unbelievable: The plot of the book is incredible.
Syn. 2. farfetched, astonishing, preposterous.

And it is incredible that the church would try opening an Ideal Org without making the “non-existence” campaign funding part of the game up front.

And it is incredible that the church would continue to call the marketing of a newly-opened Ideal Org a “non-existence” campaign. After all, you want to promote its existence, not its non-existence.

And it is incredible that the church would continue to try to play the “donate us all the money you can – trust us – it’ll be great!” game even after the Idle Org has been open for nine months.

— written by Plain Old Thetan

P.S. Hey Phoenix! I still didn’t sign up for this list!

Number of views:1822
  

4 Comments

Dirk Niblick  on March 29th, 2013

I haven’t seen a single piece of evidence that there is an org here in Phoenix… except for the sketchy, littering postcard that was left on my car one day while I was shopping. I drive around town quite a bit and read the local paper/local websites quite a bit too. No ads. No TV. No mailers. No nothing. Non-existence is right.

Actually, here’s hoping it stays that way.

PlainOldThetan, how big is the COS membership in Phoenix anyway? Am I right when I assume that it’s probably just 100-200 actually active members in the metro area?

PlainOldThetan  on March 29th, 2013

It’s about 100-200 alright. Even though the Phoenix Org Grand Opening press release claimed there were 1500 people at the grand opening, our onsite moles reported to us there were maybe 400-500 people there. (/?p=8631) Since over half were ferried in on busses from Los Angeles and were mostly Sea Org members sacrificing their libs day as part of “the greatest good for the greatest number of dynamics”, and another 100+ were the staff members of the Phoenix Idyllic Org, and given that twenty or so were from Tucson and Flagstaff, your estimate is right on.

If you’re a masochist and go in to the org and ask to see the OIC, one week’s worth of Bulk Mail Out would substantiate your guess.

That brings up something I suspect about Idyllic Orgs. There’s a “critical mass” necessary to make them work. Maybe LA Org or maybe Pasadena Org has a critical-enough-mass to make an Idle Org work. But not Inglewood. Or Dallas. Maybe, just maybe, Orange County. Maybe not.

xenubarb  on April 6th, 2013

I hate to admit to this, but it’s really heart-wrenching to read these things, because of the poor, deluded true believers left to Make It Go Right. And it’s not Going Right anywhere, except in countries of little brown people you never heard of and only see in IAS We’re So Great videos at the org Special Events and Briefings.

The Tustin org just blew its wad on a monstrous edifice it can’t afford. I feel so sorry for the many elderly people I’ve seen at the old org, a shabby 50s medical center lookin thing.

Their golden years have been drained by a bloodsucking parasite whose initials are DM…

Golden Age of Knowledge isn’t working too well  on April 30th, 2013

[...] Jobs’ video around the Super Bowl. You can also sample the desperate, grasping efforts to run the Idle Org Non-existence campaigns. You could also do your own examination of the corny, hokey, contrived “promo pieces” sent out [...]

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