Possibly Helpful Advice

Finding your way after leaving the cult of Scientology

The Telephone Call…

Another moment in... The Twilight Zone.


Me: Hello?

Caller: Hello, I just wanted to find out what it is you need to get here.

Me: Who are you and where is here?

Caller: I’m the person in charge of arrivals, you know, here at AOLA, where you need to come. I want to help you get here.

Me: You want to help me?

AOLA Caller: Of course.

Me: But, I don’t need any help and I didn’t ask for any help.

AOLA Caller: Well, to get you here, I’m going to help you get through whatever barriers there are, preventing you from coming. Now, tell me, what barriers are preventing you from coming.

Me: I don’t have any barriers, and I didn’t ask for your help.

AOLA Caller : Of course you have barriers, which is why you’re not here doing your next level.

Me: So, you’re going to tell me what I have when you don’t know, ‘cause you don’t know me, and you’re going to try to force help on me? Is this what you do? You force help on others?

AOLA Caller: I’m not forcing anything.

Me: I tell you what, next time you’re in New York City, mid-day, mid-week, grab someone’s arm, and don’t let go, and help them across the street, when they didn’t ask you to, and see what kind of a reaction you might get, by trying to force your help on others. You think you might get your ass kicked?

You think?

AOLA Caller: I have another call coming in, have to take this call.

Me: OK.


This was an actual phone conversation with the Church of Scientology, Inc.

Please feel free to submit your own phone conversations with robots from the Church of Scientology, Inc.

Write up your Twilight Zone moment and join the party.

— written by Just Curious

Number of views:10918


Centurion  on June 18th, 2012

Oh my, that was priceless. You have to get that posted on Marty’s site.

SomeoneElse  on June 19th, 2012

The thing is, of course, that it’s no more absurd than their pleading questonnaire emails – It just sounds that way when you hear it over the phone.

Hazel  on June 19th, 2012

This was not a phone call, but written comm…
I informed the sender, who had wanted to set up an interview to “help” me…that, while I appreciated their care, I was fine and that I was not asking for help at this time.
The response was…many days later…”I don’t know how to respond to this?”… funny, but true….

plainoldthetan  on June 20th, 2012

What many people are seeing is rote robotic application of HCO PL 16 April 1965 III HANDLING THE PUBLIC INDIVIDUAL. The way staff members are being trained these days is “tell the public to do something and he’ll do it”. Other people, the less brainwashed people, the people with detectable will and exhibiting the capacity to think, will do things that the currently-trained staff member doesn’t know what the >bleep< to do with.

If you don’t believe me, think back to the last event you went to. Didn’t some android walk up to you, thrust out a bag and say “Cash or Charge?” If you don’t respond with cash or charge, the android starts to smoke and blow up, just like the computers on Star Trek or the “lawgivers” run by Landru in the Star Trek episode “Return of the Archons”.

plainoldthetan  on June 26th, 2012

“AOLA Caller : Of course you have barriers, which is why you’re not here doing your next level.”

The sad fact underlying this statement is that the church thinks it’s true and has rigidly indoctrinated its staff into thinking it’s a fact.

The arrogance of the church is along these lines “no matter how much we foul up, it’s your personal barriers keeping you off the bridge, but never, ever, ever is OUR FOUL-UPS a valid reason for you not going up the bridge.” Therefore the church has gotten into a dwindling spiral of foul-ups that you, as a parishioner, have to endure wordlessly in order to keep going up the bridge.

There’s a corollary for the IAS, too. “No matter how much we foul up, it’s your personal barriers and failings keeping you from donating every cent in your possession to the IAS, and never, ever, ever is OUR FOUL-UPS a valid reason for you not donating all your money to the IAS.”

That church-wide arrogance wasn’t as evident (or it didn’t exist so much) in the ’80s.

The church-wide problem is NEVER the church, its attitudes and its practices.

The church says parishioner’s attitudes and practices are always and the only problems in the church.


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