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Finding your way after leaving the cult of Scientology

There is more to leaving corporate Scientology than walking out the door

You are to be commended for waking up to the fact that you are involved in one of the more suppressive experiences of this lifetime.

Even if it has taken 15 intensives of sec checking and busting you back to a state of not being clear to wake you up, you still had enough presence of mind to decide that this was not for you.

So you brave the slings and arrows of those who wish to declare you and defame you and call you a piece of S**t for having been an SP for all these years and you make your move.

With bittersweet tears, you make the decision to part from those who are still drinking the Kool-Aid and you start a new life. Because you are one tough thetan, you figure out how to make a living and make new friends. You finally have a life and you are able to pay your bills and it seems like a brighter future lies ahead.

Somehow, though, you find that months or years go by and there are things you cannot say and people you cannot speak to and you keep your head down and stay quietly productive as a somewhat happy worker bee in the larger scheme of life outside Scientology, Inc.

You consider doing a Doubt Formula, but something always seems to come up and it is easier to let things lie. You feel you are outside the church, but you are uncomfortable when someone asks you directly about it. You want to keep operating under the radar and have people from the church of Miscavige stop bothering you. You also don’t want to disconnect from your friends who are faithfully contributing their lives to the church.

If you were to look at yourself from an exterior perspective (remember how to do that?) you would realize that you are operating in a lower state than when you first entered Scientology and experienced those mind-blowing wins on the Comm Course or on the HQS Course. You may even be operating in a higher level of “hiding”.

There is a solution for all of this Q and A and it is to do the Doubt Formula honestly and thoroughly. How do you know you have not completed the Doubt Formula? The last three steps are:

6. Join or remain in or befriend the one which progresses toward the greatest good for the greatest number of Dynamics and announce the fact publicly to both sides.

If you have only shared your decisions with a small circle of friends and not with the world at large, you are not through this step. If you are having difficulty getting past this step, read HCOPL 18 Dec 1982 ETHICS CONDITIONS: Hang-Up at Doubt.

7. Do everything possible to improve the actions, performance and statistics of the person, group, project or organization one has remained in or joined.

8. Suffer on up through the Conditions in the new group if one has changed sides, or the Conditions of the group one has remained in if ones doubt in it has lowered one’s status.

Once you have completed your Doubt Formula, then you are ready to repair the damage you have done to your first and second dynamics because you were being a loyal cult member.

There are lots of independent practitioners who will be glad to lend a helping hand. Once you have completed your Doubt Formula, you will find getting case gain to be a no-brainer.

The big barrier may be recognizing that you are still in Doubt. Handling that opens the door to a new life. In a future post, I will cover some of the best tools for handling your life experiences, invalidation, abuse, etc. in Scientology so that you are unstuck and are ready to get case gain in earnest.


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elizabeth hamre  on August 26th, 2012

David i am still cheering you on!!!!

Antony Phillips  on September 20th, 2012

Well, I was thrown out of the “Church” nearly 30 years ago (march 1983). It took a few months to realise that I did not have a big overt to find so I could come back in again. Then I got the Dane Tops letter (15th June 83 – I was the first in Denmark to get it). After that there were friends around, and some of us worked, and talked, together.

Present day conclusion (will change tomorrow, no doubt): There are Scientology basics, but over the years rote things and procedures have been added. They are based on the basics, but the forest of them obscures the basics. And the doubt formula recommended here is a rote procedure, based on basics. It is the last thing I would have done when I was thrown out, probability because I had had conditions formulas used on me (perhaps wrongly assigned) and had had to put my juniors through them at times when I felt they were wrong. One example was “place all your juniors in non-existence until there was no more backlog” (Pubs Org 1968).

So doing a formula was not for me. I perhaps had an advantage in that in 1957 I taught the Personal Efficiency course for six months, and really confronted basics then (and when running the Upper Indoc Trs a year or so later). So I knew Scientology basics, and there was nothing wrong with them. In fact I was still a Scientologist, and the “Church” had betrayed Scientology basics.

So I would not recommend conditions formula particularly if you have just left official Scientology. Probably better just to relax, re-establish communication with normal people, and take a new look at life. Incidentally, based on what I read, official Scientology is very much worse now than when they threw me out in 1983.

All best wishes,

Antony Phillips:

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